It’s coming up on one year since I first tried to step away from my narcissistic abuser, Arianna Folsom. Since then, I’ve dealt with much in the way of harassment (at her behest), death threats, anxiety, social isolation, and more. When I started this website it was with a heavy heart. At the time my understanding was:
- Arianna had cheated on me with another man and was covering it up by gaslighting me
- Arianna was lying about me, the nature of our relationship, and my character and conduct to her new conquests (Nugget/Nik, and AlpacaAnna)
- Because of the above lies, Nugget and I grew closer while Alpaca decided to attack and harass me without provocation.
- When I published pictures of my message exchanges with Arianna showing that she’d lied to Anna and Nugget, Arianna tried to bully me into silence.
- When the bullying didn’t work, she started claiming that I was trying to get her son taken away. She put on a very sappy sympathy exhibit for her viewers on MeetMe talking about me constantly, claiming that I was harassing her when in fact it was her and her viewers that were harassing me.
- At some point (in November) one of her viewers found one of my YouTube channels and made a death threat that was immediately taken down by YouTube but I saw the notification before the message was removed.
- I started getting a slew of death threats that I first wrote off as keyboard commando bullshit then I get a very personal threat sent to me that included specific details about my life and information about my nieces, who I do not discuss online.
- At that point I went to the police and turned over my phones (three of them) so they could do what they needed to do investigate the threats.
- I notified Arianna (around November 12th) that I had to turn over my phone to the authorities because, her claims that I was trying to get her son taken away from her lead to me turning over my phones to the authorities in multiple different jurisdictions and any one of them might happen see the text messages from her that discussed the times she drove drunk to pick up her son from school or the time she left him standing outside for hours because she was too high and fucked up to remember to go get him. In short: her actions created a situation where she could actually loose her son.
- On November 15th, I registered ariannafolsom.com to put up my side of the story because Arianna was too enamored of the attention she was getting from playing the victim. She’s a narcissist and needs to be the center of attention. She couldn’t care less if her actions lead to harm for me, all she wanted was to bask in the glow of those rallying around her because of her lies.
Less than a week after posting my first article the death threats stopped (largely). Apparently there was enough there that contradicted her version of events that the few people she’d tricked into threatening me took a step back.
November is just around the corner and I’ve been thinking about all the shit I’ve been through just because a shitty person feels so bad about herself that she needs to visit wrath upon those who get fed up with her bullshit and walk away from her. When we were together I bent over backwards to take care of her. When we broke up, I knew that she’d fucked Dylan but I let her lie go unchallenged because I don’t care who she fucks. I do care about being disrespected and I wasn’t going to tolerate disrespect, so I left. I wished her well and I thought that would be the end of it. Instead Alpaca fires off at me (again unprovoked), I try to work it out with Arianna and her lies lead to the situation we’re in now.
Since the breakup, I’ve discovered so much more about the ways she was lying and manipulating and I plan to discuss and dissect some of the things I found out:
- Her lying about me pursuing her as a GF when she’s the one who pursued a relationship with me
- Her lying about me messaging her all the time and being obsessed with her to her ex Victoria (we had conversations that clarified exactly how Arianna would use triangulation and gossip as a wedge between us)
- Her lying to Anna about me being controlling and sycophantic
- Her fucking Dylan (I discovered audio of them fucking that got caught by the tablet I bought for her son. The Amazon Alexa recordings ended up in my amazon account)
- Her lying to a slew of women she was trying to hook up with claiming either that I was just a fan who wanted to support her (making me sound like a fucking sugar daddy) or completely denying that we had any type of relationship at all
- The ways in which she talks shit about everyone in her life (and I do mean everyone) to make you predisposed to believe her future lies about them. She wants to stay in between you and everyone else so you can’t get together and compare notes to uncover her lies
- One example is her talking about someone in the fashion industry named Michael Bui. She told me this sob story about how he used his wife Mida to get her into bed in a threesome knowing that she (Arianna) is into women (and presumably not into men although that’s a falsehood. She still insists that she’s a lesbian despite carrying on three secret sexual relationships with men during the time we were together). According to the story she told, during the threesome Michael was pushy and didn’t respect her boundaries. Afterward, according to Arianna, he kept rubbing up against her and hovering around her making her feel uncomfortable while they were at this industry event in Vegas. She said he kept pressuring her for sex absent the participation of Mida. Now, it’s important for me to say that Arianna is probably lying about that whole thing. Michael Bui probably has a completely different view of what happened and I’d bet that Mida’s and Michael’s views are closer to reality than the story Arianna told. So why would she do that? Because 1) it’s good for sympathy and 2) it gives her cover. If I buy into her version of events that I am less likely to be friendly with Michael and Mida who are both in her industry. She can keep the truth from coming out by staying in the middle, telling them things about me and telling me things about them. She’s a really good manipulator.
It’s emotionally draining to talk about some of this because while I quickly let go of my attachment to Arianna, it took a while for me to stop reacting to her ploys for more narcissistic supply from me. She’d do something and I’d react. Now there’s nothing she can do to cause any response other than me sending a packet of prepared documents to CPS, Orange County Sheriff’s dept, San Diego Sheriff’s dept, and the FBI. I’ve stopped caring about her wholesale. I don’t care about how she’s doing, what she’s doing, or anything else. I don’t care if she’s happy, sad, depressed, whatever. Unfortunately, I’m still recovering from the toll of having to deal with a narcissistic abuser’s smear campaign.
I’ve been working on a few projects that are about to launch and it would be nice to completely put all of this behind me. I don’t want to have to maintain a website about my crazy piece of shit ex and all the things she’s lied about or put me through. I’ve reached out to Arianna multiple times to try to put an end to the bullshit. I let it be known that I have no interest in being friends but we could at least stop wasting people’s time with her lies about me and me needing to tell the truth in a public forum (this web site) unfortunately she insists on holding on to her lies.
As a result she, ironically, is keeping this site up. This site would have been gone long ago if she’d just told the truth. The last time I made an offer to get past all of this was around May and she decided to lie about me, again claiming that I was obsessed with her. Since I can’t trust her not to continue to lie, the only way this site will get taken down is if she makes a public statement acknowledging all of the bullshit she’s responsible for and I do mean all of it. I know things now that she would never think I’d know of because after the site went up, people who had seen what a shitty person she is started sending me droves of text messages, recorded conversations, clips from her live streams, and more. So a half-assed partial admission won’t work. It would have to be the whole shebang and it would have to be very public. Her narcissism won’t allow her to make such an admission so this site will likely be up for years to come. I run my own servers and just renewed the hosting agreements at the various data centers I use for the next 5 years.
If you’re pissed off that there’s a site about her and you think it should be taken down, then encourage her to come clean. It costs me nothing to maintain this site so I can leave it on autopilot for the next decade or more.